National Adoption Awareness Month

I'll be the first to admit that I didn't really know much about adoption before I found out that I was pregnant. I thought it was something a 16 year old did when they accidentally got pregnant and their mom and dad's forced them to give the baby up. Adoption was this secretive thing that was basically a taboo subject, especially if you were the birth parent. But people who actually did the adopting were to be praised. (And I still believe this wholeheartedly. I adore my daughters adoptive parents and I always will.) But I wanted to help educate everyone on this amazing thing called adoption. It's not taboo. It never should have been and we can be the ones who remove the stigma. 

National Adoption Awareness Month has quite the history...in fact, it originally started as just a week-long event back in 1984. President Reagan started it to help bring to light the need for adoptive families for all of the children in foster care. Then in 1995, President Clinton upped the ante and made it an entire month!  In fact, Clinton asked The Department of Health and Human Services to use this *new thing* called the internet to create a tool that would make it easier for families to find children to adopt in 1998. Despite what you may think about President Clinton, you gotta admit that was pretty cool of him. 

For me, my education on adoption really began after I told my parents about Charlie. You can read my older posts for more on that difficult conversation, but needless to say, we were all in agreement that adoption was definitely the best choice for this little baby. It wasn't a matter of whether or not I would be a good mother or not, in fact I feel like I am an awesome mother for making the decision that I did. But we wanted Charlie to have parents who loved each other, a home that was safe and we wanted her to have every opportunity and advantage for success. She deserves everything and I wanted to give her that. 

I find it ironic now, after reading about Clinton's request for the internet search tool, but I literally started at Google. I just typed in adoption agencies and Bethany Christian Services popped up. I followed the link to their website and found out there was a branch in Des Moines. I gave them a call and was meeting with an advocate a week later. It all happened so quickly and they were so helpful with everything. But it's still crazy to think that I started looking for parents for my baby on the internet. Sure, you can buy a car from some rando on Craigslist, but parents for a real life baby?! Yep, did it on the internet. And to be honest, I think it's amazing that the resources are SO EASY to find because how else are scared mothers who don't know what to do, going to find help otherwise? 

Now, I will say that I'm dumbing down the journey that was actually required to find parents for Charlie...it's not like a dating website where you read a profile and swipe right. But it did start online, and then I got their book, and then I got to meet them. And I loved them. I never had doubts and I still don't. Would you believe that they STILL send me photos of my sweet girl every week, even 2 1/2 years later? That's serious love. 

But I want to go back to my second sentence in this blog. The biggest thing I've learned about adoption is that it's not just for scared 16 year olds. Sure, they are certainly a part of this adoption equation, but take me for example. I was 25, worked a full time job, lived on my own and for all intents and purposes, had a pretty successful life ahead of me. But I'm not the only exception; think of all the birth dads out there. I can't imagine how difficult it would be to make this type of decision for a person you aren't carrying, to have to figure out a way to work with the birth mom to find the best plan for your child. 

But aside from this, I think, or at least I hope, that by myself and all of the other strong birth parents out in the world who are sharing their story, the world will be forced to change their mentality on adoption. It it my prayer that all parties involved in the adoption (birth parents, adoptive parents, families and especially the child) would be treated with respect and love. This shouldn't be a secret or taboo subject to talk about. Adoption is beautiful. It's has saved countless lives. I would be lost without this option. 

I'll be posting a bit more this month because I know I haven't shared a lot lately and I want to help celebrate adoption and truly bring awareness. 

xoxo